Sitting on my bed

I wait for the call

Waiting to hear

The leukemia

Has returned to kill

I knew the signs

Bruising,

Weak,

No appetite,

All were present

And then some

My phone rings

My heart stops

Butterflies turn violent

In my stomach

I answer

It’s back…

My throat tightens

I try to hold back my anger

To god

To fate

It’s all held down

But not everything

Can stay

Down

My eyes leak

Poison; burning, scorching

I lash out unforgivingly

Anger and hate

Rush through

And out of me

It’s dangerous

To feel

Like this

A war between science and fate

A war between the odds

A war between life and death

A war I know my sister

Can win

9 months

Of torture

Excruciating pain

Invading her bones

Bone marrow transplants

Thick needles

Stuck into her

Bones; into her

Small body.

Agony

Lasting agony

“I give up”

“Let me die”

“I’m done”

Heartbreaking

Words

I send her paragraphs and essays convincing

Her that I love her and why.

I wouldn’t

Let god

Take my little

Sister. My best friend.

Stuck in the hospital

Surrounded

By death

But Death

Did not dare

Touch

My angel

9 months…

Sitting on my bed

I wait for the call

Waiting to hear

The leukemia

Has left for good.

I pace

My heart racing

A simple ring

I answer

It’s over… it’s gone

Tears race

Down my face

A smile

I couldn’t control

I try to hold

It all in but to do so

Was impossible

I jump and scream

Noises

Not even words

Happiness

Indistinguishable

Happiness

My angel lives

The war between the odds

5% chance of living.

She won.